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Post by iamjumbo on Jun 5, 2010 7:53:06 GMT -5
Exactly..........even though my friends and co-workers weren't with me every day......they knew what was going on.....they saw the changes in personality.....for one thing.....they saw the changes in clothes......they were out with us when he would start fights with everyone else and were pretty sure it didn't stop when we left to go home......also just the way he referred to me and treated me in public wasn't that nice. There are signs........and certainly if the woman works outside the house there should be someone that can testify to something. Even if no one ever actually saw him hit her..........these men have patterns....... and they never, ever change
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Post by iamjumbo on Jun 5, 2010 7:55:55 GMT -5
I was talking about this case this afternoon with some friends and they all agreed with me. He may well have been a mongrel and deserved what he got but she could have been charged with manslaughter and given a token 1 hour in the prison governor's office. It may well be appealed. I hope it will be because this case is just sending out a bad message. What, I think, has sealed the deal for us is that she has apparently, made a deal with a TV station and a woman's mag to sell her story. I thought you couldn't profit from a crime you committed, but maybe that's only if you're found guilty. it can't be appealed. that would be double jeopardy. she has been acquitted of the crime, which means that she didn't commit a crime, so she CAN profit from the incident, since the incident has been deemed to not have been a crime
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Post by sadie on Jun 5, 2010 8:33:40 GMT -5
not really. i've dealt with a couple hundred of you, but, the part i never will comprehend is how you can allow yourself to believe stupidity that you know for a fact is a lie Well....you know.....he didn't start out that way....he was Prince Charming.....he was everything I seemed to want. Then he just wanted to do everything for me....take care of everything for me......I seemed so spoiled at first......I didn't realize he was taking over every aspect of my life. Then he seemed to start questioning other people's motives for things.....making it seem they had not evil intentions...I don't know how to explain it......made it seem like only he was thinking of me.....of my future....or of good for me.......so.....knocking out support beams.....last of all.....my parents.......then of course I got pregnant.....so we got married......then suddenly he always needed to use my car....when his was this older standard truck that I couldn't drive......so I couldn't go anywhere......so I was always stuck at home.......so then I'm trapped at home....way out in the country........it was all a pretty decent plan....when you look back at it......almost completely dependent on him.....hardly trusted anyone else......knew it would cause a huge fight if I called anyone to come get me.........and all I heard from him every day was the broken record of what he thought of me.........
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Post by gabriel on Jun 5, 2010 8:50:10 GMT -5
No, this thread is not aabout women who have been in abusive relationships.
It's about one woman who was in an abusive relationship who planned her husband's murder, was charged with premeditated murder and found not guilty.
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Post by sadie on Jun 5, 2010 9:41:00 GMT -5
True......but we're trying to explain the mindset......the caged animal feeling that they live in. So that every time that person comes home they are on alert.......and feel they could be attacked.
I'm torn by this case also.......I still feel like once she got him knocked out......take off......I don't remember whether it mentioned children........it certainly doesn't mention whether she had anyone to run to.....but often they have been part of the threat.....that he will harm them....so you don't want to run there.......but I still feel like I would have run to a shelter......and taken my chances there.
I also feel like this sends a horrible message.....that it is all right to kill....with no judge or jury......and that doesn't sit right with me.........
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Post by iamjumbo on Jun 5, 2010 10:47:09 GMT -5
not really. i've dealt with a couple hundred of you, but, the part i never will comprehend is how you can allow yourself to believe stupidity that you know for a fact is a lie Well....you know.....he didn't start out that way....he was Prince Charming.....he was everything I seemed to want. Then he just wanted to do everything for me....take care of everything for me......I seemed so spoiled at first......I didn't realize he was taking over every aspect of my life. Then he seemed to start questioning other people's motives for things.....making it seem they had not evil intentions...I don't know how to explain it......made it seem like only he was thinking of me.....of my future....or of good for me.......so.....knocking out support beams.....last of all.....my parents.......then of course I got pregnant.....so we got married......then suddenly he always needed to use my car....when his was this older standard truck that I couldn't drive......so I couldn't go anywhere......so I was always stuck at home.......so then I'm trapped at home....way out in the country........it was all a pretty decent plan....when you look back at it......almost completely dependent on him.....hardly trusted anyone else......knew it would cause a huge fight if I called anyone to come get me.........and all I heard from him every day was the broken record of what he thought of me......... i just don't know what it is with girls. you're a smart girl, and not all the girls i ever dealt with were dumb. hell, a couple were college educated. for some reason though, every one of the things you mention was a hoisted red flag, but you waited until there was a hundred of them to get the message. AND, you are typical. you did it right though. this chick didn't
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Post by iamjumbo on Jun 5, 2010 10:49:34 GMT -5
No, this thread is not aabout women who have been in abusive relationships. It's about one woman who was in an abusive relationship who planned her husband's murder, was charged with premeditated murder and found not guilty. yes sir, it IS. that is the jist of the whole case. if that defense were actually presented, and presented competently, there would have been several "speiclists" testifying as to the nature of abuse, the various ramifications, and the feelings that ALL abused women share in common.
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Post by iamjumbo on Jun 5, 2010 10:52:07 GMT -5
True......but we're trying to explain the mindset......the caged animal feeling that they live in. So that every time that person comes home they are on alert.......and feel they could be attacked. I'm torn by this case also.......I still feel like once she got him knocked out......take off......I don't remember whether it mentioned children........it certainly doesn't mention whether she had anyone to run to.....but often they have been part of the threat.....that he will harm them....so you don't want to run there.......but I still feel like I would have run to a shelter......and taken my chances there. I also feel like this sends a horrible message.....that it is all right to kill....with no judge or jury......and that doesn't sit right with me......... you know that i'm a big fan of making things self defense, but, there does have to be a viable threat, real or imagined. as you say, once he was knocked out, she had more than sufficient opportunity to leave, and shoot him if he came around her again. doing it this way was not self defense
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Post by sadie on Jun 5, 2010 12:42:27 GMT -5
I told you.......I look back....and still want to kick myself.....there weren't just red flags.....there were practically nuclear bombs going off.....one of those cases of love being blind.....stupid......deaf......moronic.....idiotic.......did I mention stupid........
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Post by gabriel on Jun 5, 2010 19:21:07 GMT -5
What do they say about love being blind? Don't be so hard on yourself. you made a misjudgement of character. You're not the 1st and you won't be the last.
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