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Post by beth on Jan 10, 2017 3:13:56 GMT -5
Can children who show a predisposition to anger problems learn to deal with them at an early age? This is a pretty good link. Please read it (it won't take long) and then, comment. Anger overload in children: diagnostic and treatment issues www.greatschools.org/gk/articles/anger-overload/
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Post by Scottish Lassie on Jan 10, 2017 23:52:31 GMT -5
Can children who show a predisposition to anger problems learn to deal with them at an early age? This is a pretty good link. Please read it (it won't take long) and then, comment. Anger overload in children: diagnostic and treatment issues www.greatschools.org/gk/articles/anger-overload/Hi Beth, It may sink in eventually. The message has to be given early. Don't we all learn at our Mother's knee, so that is early.!!!. At school it should become compulsory. IMO.
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Post by mouse on Jan 11, 2017 6:55:03 GMT -5
all children learn or should learn to deal with anger issues firstly at home and then the school and from society in general somehow many in the west have lost the plot when it comes to expectations from children at home..at school and society in general due to a change of thinking [generally] children these days don't get disciplined or taught how to behave or control their anger and feelings .. without discipline many children turn into the brats and unpleasant little oiks we see running around who have absolutely no boundries and no social behaviour or an awareness of other peoples rights and expectations
when I say discipline I do not mean beating or necessarily any physical restraint
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Post by beth on Jan 11, 2017 9:23:56 GMT -5
You're talking about everyday acting out. That's sometimes the case ... average children who need to be taught how to behave. I agree, but having had the experience, I can assure you there are children who are less well equipped to deal with anger issues.
I have 3 children, by 2 fathers. The older two had these problems as children but dealt with it in different ways. Their father had similar problems as an adult (no brakes or no ability to apply brakes to various situations). My youngest (different father) has never had that problem. She is a low key, pleasant person with the ability to adjust to various things, easily.
These differences are true of many children. It's a cop-out to say oh, well, they just need better discipline and blame the parents.
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Post by mouse on Jan 12, 2017 6:25:45 GMT -5
you may see it as a cop out ..but it isn't first the parent should be able to determin between a normal anger/temper and the personality of the child and go from there and act accordingly the schools too should be able to pick up on the type of anger the child is showing and the personality of the child and from there..handling the child accordingly or bringing in persons more trained in child behaviour its all about knowing the child and then teaching the child the various ways of reacting to the issues which make the anger in the first place I know with mine they had to be treated in different ways..my youngest son was much more physical reaction in his anger than the eldest one ...
but if there are no general house/school/societal boundries in the first place then it becomes harder to pin point the anger issues and problems with the individual child and yes blame the parents for the out of control children ..thus muddying the waters between children with real anger issue and children whose only way of getting attention or their own way by presenting anger and uncontrolled behaviour
and imo young children can be taught to deal with those issues starting at an early age ...I am not saying that its always successful at an early age...but a start can be made within the scope of the childs abilities and understanding
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Post by beth on Jan 12, 2017 12:15:38 GMT -5
you may see it as a cop out ..but it isn't first the parent should be able to determin between a normal anger/temper and the personality of the child and go from there and act accordingly the schools too should be able to pick up on the type of anger the child is showing and the personality of the child and from there..handling the child accordingly or bringing in persons more trained in child behaviour its all about knowing the child and then teaching the child the various ways of reacting to the issues which make the anger in the first place I know with mine they had to be treated in different ways..my youngest son was much more physical reaction in his anger than the eldest one ... but if there are no general house/school/societal boundries in the first place then it becomes harder to pin point the anger issues and problems with the individual child and yes blame the parents for the out of control children ..thus muddying the waters between children with real anger issue and children whose only way of getting attention or their own way by presenting anger and uncontrolled behaviour and imo young children can be taught to deal with those issues starting at an early age ...I am not saying that its always successful at an early age...but a start can be made within the scope of the childs abilities and understanding I think I've tried to open this subject for discussion before (some time ago) and it didn't go well. Obviously, the POV is so different this thread is going to come up against the same problems. Therefore, I'll withdraw further comment and it can sink or swim as it will, but without me.
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Post by Scottish Lassie on Jan 12, 2017 21:34:02 GMT -5
all children learn or should learn to deal with anger issues firstly at home and then the school and from society in general somehow many in the west have lost the plot when it comes to expectations from children at home..at school and society in general due to a change of thinking [generally] children these days don't get disciplined or taught how to behave or control their anger and feelings .. without discipline many children turn into the brats and unpleasant little oiks we see running around who have absolutely no boundries and no social behaviour or an awareness of other peoples rights and expectations when I say discipline I do not mean beating or necessarily any physical restraint Hi Mouse, you are exactly right and it worries me that if they are not able to constrain their behaviour by the time they have reached adulthood, who knows what to expect?There might be rioting in the street or even worse. We might have to get on our knees and start praying? LOL.
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Post by Scottish Lassie on Jan 12, 2017 21:50:31 GMT -5
When I was bringing up my children, I always explained to them why I wanted them to do this or that, I never gave out orders, I would ASK them to do whatever by saying: "will you do this for Mummy and if needed, I would explain why I wanted them to do it. If their behaviour was questionable I reached the stage where all I had to do was raise my eyebrows and they knew that I didn't approve of their behaviour, so would not continue. They trusted me.!!!
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Post by Scottish Lassie on Jan 12, 2017 23:21:03 GMT -5
you may see it as a cop out ..but it isn't first the parent should be able to determin between a normal anger/temper and the personality of the child and go from there and act accordingly the schools too should be able to pick up on the type of anger the child is showing and the personality of the child and from there..handling the child accordingly or bringing in persons more trained in child behaviour its all about knowing the child and then teaching the child the various ways of reacting to the issues which make the anger in the first place I know with mine they had to be treated in different ways..my youngest son was much more physical reaction in his anger than the eldest one ... but if there are no general house/school/societal boundries in the first place then it becomes harder to pin point the anger issues and problems with the individual child and yes blame the parents for the out of control children ..thus muddying the waters between children with real anger issue and children whose only way of getting attention or their own way by presenting anger and uncontrolled behaviour and imo young children can be taught to deal with those issues starting at an early age ...I am not saying that its always successful at an early age...but a start can be made within the scope of the childs abilities and understanding Hi Mouse, You are so right.!!! I'm just remembering that when my Mother wanted us to do anything, she never ordered us to do it, she always asked and sometimes even showed us how it was done. She made every little chore seem like fun, which was why we were so willing to do what she asked. In bringing up my children I certainly did apparently learn at my Mother's knee, so I have her to thank for the good behaviour of my children. She was definitely an excellent role model for which I'm so grateful. I loved my parents dearly. I learned good behaviour traits from my Father also.
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Post by mouse on Jan 13, 2017 5:54:50 GMT -5
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